“And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them, and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed, in that are signs for people who give thought.” [Surah Ar-Rum, 30:21]
Marriage has always been considered a significant act of Ibadah (worship) encouraged by our beloved Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). Islam, being the complete way of life, has assigned clear roles and responsibilities for both husband and wife.
The Prophet (PBUH) said: “Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock. The ruler who governs the people is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. A man is the shepherd of the members of his household and is responsible for them. A woman is the shepherd of her husband’s house and children, and is responsible for them…”
[Al-Bukhari & Muslim]
The hadeeth above specifies that the duty of managing the household, and taking care of the husband’s and children’s needs fall under the dominion of the wife. Traditionally, married women ensure that they maintain a comfortable home that exudes love and warmth for her family.
She ensures that the household is run smoothly and that her family is fed healthy meals. She pays careful attention to the needs of her husband and supports him through his endeavours. She supervises her children’s education and provides care and attention to their physical and emotional needs.
Most importantly, she ensures that her little ones grow up receiving the proper knowledge and values of Islam. It is certainly no doubt that the women of a Muslim home are the glue that binds the entire family together, and Islam acknowledges their efforts and ensures that all Muslims respect and value their women.
Today’s world sees quite a different outlook of marriage than the traditional union. Some women wholeheartedly choose to be full-time housewives proudly dedicating their time and effort towards their beloved family—which is certainly not an easy task although some may believe otherwise. Some others are working mothers/wives by choice or circumstance (divorced, financial issues, ill husband, etc.) and are tasked with juggling office work, household work, children, and husband at the same time—which is also not an easy task although some may devalue her. No matter what the circumstance is, Islam has placed a great big responsibility towards wives and mothers, and hence should ensure that her duties towards her family are taken care of to the best of her capabilities.
“Your spouses are a garment for you as you are for them”
[Surah Al-Baqarah, 2:187]
Islam identifies the relationship between the spouses as one that provided care and protection for each other—which the word garment signifies in the above verse. Although marriage is most often discussed as a burden and in a negative light today, the Islamic view of marriage is a union of a lifetime that provides love, joy, and tranquillity. The relationship between Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) and Khadija is the best example of such a marriage.
Of course, marriage is not a bed of roses— many problems and misunderstandings do occur often. These issues may surface directly between the husband and wife, or between a spouse and their in-laws that could have a major impact on the marriage. In times such as these when all hope seems to have been lost, remember that this life is meant to have many trials to challenge you and make you stronger.
“Do not lose hope, not be sad” [Holy Quran 3:139].
Main Image: Parastoo Maleki, Unsplash
By Natasha Syed